Mommyhood

I yell at my kids.

Sometimes, I yell too much in a day.

Other times, I have the patience of Mother Teresa and I don’t yell (too much.)

It’s always so painful to see the aftermath of a crazy yelling spree. It’s downright heartbreaking.

Sometimes, it feels good to yell. Because you’ve had it up to HERE and you’re just DONE. So when that righteous anger kicks in and you start to yell, my my, don’t it feel good for a split second.

But when that split second is over, the shame, guilt and sadness wash over you and take you down to wanting to curl up and cry.

So, what do you do after you yell at your kids?

You’ve already yelled. And you’ve faced the shell shocked looks on the faces of your kids.

This post contains affiliate links. Please see my disclosure at the bottom of the page.

Here’s what to do AFTER you yell at your kids:

Say You’re Sorry

Take a deep breath, calm down and then apologize. It doesn’t matter if your kids are 1 and 2 or 11 and 12. Teach them to apologize when they’ve made a mistake starting as soon as you can.

It’s these moments that teach integrity and show that you view them as tiny humans- not just kids who don’t need an explanation or an apology.

It also shows your children that YOU are human too and that everyone struggles with controlling their emotions at times. This is GOOD for them.

Explain Yourself

Always explain your reaction and thought pattern. Were you running on fumes and little sleep? Tell them that! Even if they seem too young to understand. Say it in a way that they CAN understand.

“Mommy was up a lot last night and didn’t get enough sleep.”

“Mom didn’t eat breakfast this morning and got a little bit grumpy.”

Reset

I’ve talked about this in some of my other posts, like this one. Having a reset is crucial for ALL of you to move on after you’ve lost it.

Our favorite way is to sit down in a circle on the floor (it’s important you get down to their level). Grab hands with each other. Now, go around the circle and each one of you says 1-3 things you love about each other.

Guys, usually by this point I am BAWLING. It’s extremely hard not to feel empathy and compassion when you are holding their tiny hands and looking into their innocent eyes.

Forgive Yourself

This might be the most important (aside from apologizing), simply because you’re the only one who can do it. Your kids will forgive and move on with their day because they live in the moment and that’s what kids do.

Us momma’s, we have a tendency to relive every horrible moment over and over and OVER again. Doing this, isn’t good for you. Because each time you do it, you’re also reliving the emotions that ran through your body. It’s almost like a drug.

Same with reliving being angry- you can rile yourself and get super mad again.

So, try not to do this. Actively tell yourself “I forgive myself.”

And when the memory keeps popping up, keep telling yourself that you’re forgiven and it’s time to move on.

Dwelling on it won’t make it better, I can promise you that. Move forward and try to do better.

Is It A Pattern?

This one can be hard to pin point because it’s hard to take a step back and analyze yourself and your days. And it’s hard to admit, perhaps, that you have a pattern involving anger.

I can tell you right now, I KNOW a pattern that never fails to make me SO FREAKING MAD.

It’s the mornings my daughter has school. She gets picked up by a bus. If we don’t get everything in order the night before, I can pretty much guarantee a blow up. This is because on top of the stress of getting her out the door, we are running around like maniacs looking for her folder, a book that’s due, a toy for show and tell, all while my anxiety creeps higher and higher.

Then there will be one small thing asked on top of all that and BAM- I’m done, I’m yelling.

So, I took note of this and now try to make sure that her backpack has her folder, book and toy packed the night before. Same with a lunch packed and an outfit chosen.

It really, truly helps.

What are the patterns in your house? What can you do to change them?

***

Parenting is straight up insanity. You’re constantly pushed to your limits and having your senses over stimulated. The requests and tasks are never ending and a break doesn’t really exist unless you make it happen.

I just want you to know that we’ve all done it. We’ve all yelled at our kids. It sucks. But it’s normal. It’s normal to lose our cool once in a while.

What’s important is how you handle it after and what you’re doing to prevent it from happening in the first place. We’re learning every single day. There’s no manual. You have to keep experiencing and trying different things before you get it ‘right.’

But who’s to say what’s wrong or right? It looks different for different families.

Try your best, treat your kids like kind and wise humans and give yourself some grace.

I hope you this gave you a good idea of what to do after you yell at your kids. If you have any words of advice or encouragement for other moms, please leave a comment!

Looking for more positive parenting advice?

• 17 Tips For Becoming A Calmer Parent
• How To Be A Calmer Parent
• Signs Of Bad Parenting
• Ways To Beat Mom Burnout
• To The Mom Who Is Questioning Why She Had Kids
• How To Be The Best Mom You Can
• Millennial Moms- Are We Failing?

HOW TO BECOME A CALM PARENT

This post contains affiliate links. Please see my disclosure at the bottom of the page.

If you’re a parent you’ve definitely googled “how can I be a calmer parent” or “how can I be a more relaxed parent?” Or you’ve at least thought it to yourself.

Having children causes tremendous personal growth. They teach us how to be selfless, caring and kind. They teach us humility, because who else has had those beautiful, intense moments shattered by ‘mom, I found a booger.’

They also bring out a dark side. One that maybe you didn’t realize you had. It’s scary when you come face to face with it. And it usually happens when you’re sleep deprived and not prepared for it.

Maybe it’s a passing thought at 3 am when you’re holding a screaming baby and it flits across your brain ‘I’m actually close to throwing my child across the room.” It’s horrifying and you wonder how it could even happen.

Or, maybe, the dark side of you rears its ugly head when you are at the end of your already frayed rope and your kids have been fighting all morning and you lose it. Not just a ‘stop it!’ or ‘be quiet!’ but a full blown ‘can’t you two shut up, I can’t stand it anymore, SHUT UP!’

It leaves you wondering who you are. And sometimes, I’ve even wished I’d never had kids so I didn’t have to see that ugly side of myself.

But, perhaps, there’s beauty in it too. To learn that every single human being on this planet is made up of so many layers, and some of them are not so pretty.

You might be wondering, ‘how CAN I be calmer?’

Where there’s a will- there’s a way.

Embrace The Insanity Of Children

I still fight with this every single day. I act like my kids should be quiet and not spill stuff or make a huge mess. And why? Why do I do this to myself.

Having children is complete insanity. It’s repetition (of questions and actions and thoughts), it’s chaos, it’s beautiful, it’s LIFE.

On the days where I decide to embrace the insanity, I have a lot more fun. I laugh more and don’t get worried over the messes and clutter.

Let Go Of Your Expectations

What happens when you expect something to go a certain way and it doesn’t? Usually, you’re not thrilled. Dealing with kids is crazy town. Ditch your expectations and start each day with and INTENTION instead of an EXPECTATION.

Intend to have a good day, intend to be calmer, intend to laugh more and react with kindness.

Take Time Alone (Quietly)

Kids are extremely intense on all of our senses. They are constantly hanging off you, yelling for no reason, acting wild, fighting or making a mess. And really, why wouldn’t they be, they’re kids!

But.

It’s a barrage on all of your senses. Take some when you can to have some quiet moments. It really helps you to be a calmer parent when you come back to the chaos.

RELATED: 7 Reasons To Be A Stay At Home Mom (and 7 reasons not to)

Get A Hobby

Find something that brings you joy and do it as often as you can. Whether it’s something physical like running or yoga or something creative like painting or crafting.

Don’t act like it’s some silly thing you kind of like to do. It’s not silly and it will keep you sane.

Take Things Less Seriously

This is something I struggle with everyday. But I’m getting better! When is the last time you laughed your head off with your kids? Sometimes when I stop thinking about my neverending to-do list or put my frickin phone down, I tune in to how funny and sweet my kids are being.

Yeah, the house is a disaster and there’s a mountain of laundry. But you’re safe, you’ve got food to eat and a roof over your head. Laugh with your kids and be grateful for what you have.

Say ‘Yes’ As Often As You Can

I love to say no. It’s my go to answer for anything my kids ask. Why? Because it’s become a habit. If you do the same, I challenge to ask yourself why you’re saying no to certain things.

Of course, I still say no to things that are important and warrant a no. But the little things? A big fat YES.

I want to wear my pajamas to the grocery store! – sure kid!

I want a purple cup not a green cup! –why not!

We need to pull all of the blankets out of the closet to build a fort! – do it!

They won’t be small forever. One day, their wants will be a lot harder to say yes to (like borrowing the car to go to a party) so say yes to their sweet and innocent wants and save yourself the trouble of a fight or argument.

Always Question- Never Accuse

It’s never as it seems. Even if it seems cut and dried, always ask what happened in a non accusatory way when your kids have done something that seems bad. It’ll help you remain calm to take those extra few seconds to calmly ask what happened before pointing the finger of blame.

Forgive Yourself

You won’t always know how to control your anger with your kids. Or, even if you KNOW how, you won’t be able to. Because, well, the whole human aspect. Don’t dwell on what you’ve done and feel sick about it for days. Kids are resilient, they bounce back so fast. What’s important is that you do your best to repair the damage, learn from your mistakes and FORGIVE YOURSELF.

No one else can do that for you. It’s up to you.

Exercise

Exercising is so so so important to your physical AND mental health. It cause a release of endorphins, it makes you feel strong and accomplished. It can help you be a calmer parent. Take your frustrations out by pounding the pavement, lifting some heavy ass weights or doing some super zen yoga. It will truly help you be a calmer parent.

What To Do If You Lose It

Sit down with your kids in a circle. Hold their hands. Look in their eyes. Go around the circle and say something you love about each of them and ask them to do the same. Hug them, hold them close and always apologize. You’re human❤

RELATED: What To Do After You Yell At Your Kids

CALM PARENTING BOOKS

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids

No Drama Discipline

Gentle Discipline

The 5 Love Languages Of Children

Beyond Time-Out

How To Stop Losing Your Sh*t

From Chaos To Calm (ADHD and other behavioral problems)

Calm The F*ck Down 

CALM PARENTING PODCASTS

Calm Parenting Podcast

Little Sprigs

Unruffled: Respectful Parenting

Hand In Hand Parenting

CALM PARENTING FREE RESOURCES

Calm Down Plan For Parents

Did you find anything on this list to help you become a calmer parent? If you have any other suggestions for other parents, let us know in the comments!

LOOKING FOR MORE POSITIVE PARENTING POSTS?

• Signs Of Bad Parenting
• Why Being A Mom Makes You A Badass
• Ways To Beat Mom Burn Out
• Best Tips For Becoming A Calm Mom

For a while after having my 3rd baby, I kind of just apologized to people-

• I’m sorry my family is big.
• I swear it’s my last baby… (Maybe?)
• I’m sorry we’re so loud.
• I’m sorry I don’t have my shit together.
• I’m sorry my children take over wherever we go…

And treated it like I was just… surviving-

• 3 kids is insane.
• How am I going to get through the day?
• Maybe when ______ happens, I’ll be happy.
• My life is has been reduced to breaking up fights and wiping butts.

NO MORE.

NO. MORE. 

Yes, having 3 kids is kind of nuts. But guess what?

So is having 1 kid. Or 2. Or 10.

The only difference is your attitude. Sincerely.

It’s time to change the script you think you were given and tap into that inner Goddess shit. And you know what? It’s time to start treating all the other moms, dads, kids, friends, homeless people on the street like they are freakin’ gods and goddesses too.

BECAUSE THEY ARE.

BECAUSE YOU ARE.

Even on our worst days we are here to learn and to teach others.

So instead of apologizing and surviving-

it’s time to start owning up to our shit and living the life we were meant to!

You are not a victim.

You are kick ass, bad ass mama lion raising the kindest, coolest little humans on the planet.

You don’t need to apologize for that!

This post contains affiliate links. Please see my disclosure at the bottom of the page.

Here are the top ways you can absolutely rock being a new mom of 3:

THROW YOUR EXPECTATIONS OUT THE WINDOW

No, literally open the window and yell out fuck you expectations! 

It will make this a whole lot easier.

You might have a baby that sleeps through the night and doesn’t cry except when super tired. You might have a baby who has wicked colic and screams bloody murder from 9-12. Every. Single. Night. (both true stories for me.) 

So as Elsa would say… LET IT GO!

Move on, accept things as they come and know that you have a beautiful gift each day-

A chance to completely restart. 

Every single morning you wake up-

• Don’t check your phone.
• Set your INTENTIONS for the day as in ‘I intend to have a good day, I intend to deal with things as they happen’
• Decide on one positive anchor that you can hang on to when you feel yourself spiraling into negative thoughts and emotions. It can be as simple as self-appreciation (I am strong, kind, a good person) or something you are grateful for (we have a roof over our heads, food to eat, clean water to drink) 
• When you start to spiral, grab onto one of these. It really helps to put things into perspective and pull you out.

So what happens if your day was f***** awful yesterday and you barely slept last night?

Wallow for a little while and then get over it, it’s the best thing you can do for yourself (and your kids.)

Make one hell of a gargantuan cup of coffee and meet the day with your bad assiest self ?

INVEST IN A GOOD WRAP

(If you don’t already have one, that is)

Having a wrap when you have other children is one of the best investments you can possibly make. You can:

• fold laundry
• make meals
• drink coffee easily (eff yeah.)
• play with your other kids
• go for walks and hold hands with your other kids
• type on a computer
• do pretty much anything you can think of that you need two hands.

For the first couple of months we use a fabric wrap like this one because the baby is so small and you can have them squished up (comfortably) listening to your heart beat and lulled to sleep most of the day while having your hands free!

It’s also a life saver if you have a colic-y baby because it may soothe them to be snuggled up close and warm against your body.

After the first couple of months we switch to a firmer option like this wrap– it’s easy to throw on in a hurry which you will really appreciate with 3 children. This is a mid priced wrap that we loved and have used for 2 out of 3 kids.

If you really love wraps and have some money to spend, the LennyLamb wraps are woven in Poland and they are GORGEOUS. And the most comfortable wrap I’ve ever worn. This not an affiliate link, I genuinely LOVE the LennyLamb wraps and know you will too!

MAKE A ‘PREPARED’ BOX

This is a game changer. Seriously. Whether you have 1,2 or 3 kids. Or more.

Get yourself a cute little basket or box that you can easily carry around (like these ones) and fill it with-

• Diapers 
• Wipes
• Bum cream
• Breast pads
• Nipple Cream
• SNACKS- YES! SNACKS! They are a lifesaver when you are tied down and breastfeeding, for you and your kids! If they come asking for a snack- BOOM, whip one out of your special box. 
• Sleepers for the baby
• WATER BOTTLE
• Soothers  (these soothers are the best- they are BPA free, orthodontic and dishwasher safe with over 1000 awesome reviews!)

I used this with my last two babies. It doesn’t last long but my goodness, having this on hand with a newborn is absolutely amazing!

ASK YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS FOR HELP

We are living in a time where we are literally surrounded by people but completely alone. It is now acceptable that the primary caregiver is at home, alone, with the children the majority of the time.

THIS IS SO EFFING HARD.

ON THE CAREGIVER AND THE CHILDREN.

They absolutely need positive outside influences.

And you absolutely need a break from your children sometimes.

It takes a village to raise a child. The kids in the past would have influences from all generations (aunties, uncles, cousins, grandmothers and grandfathers) helping to teach and take care of them.

If you have family nearby, cash in on your sisterhood of woman power, it is such a positive way to raise your children. If you don’t have family near then call your friends.

You’re a queen.

Your friends are queens.

They will help you and you will help them ❤

STOCK UP ON HOUSEHOLD SUPPLIES

It’s not the end of the world if someone has to run out for toilet paper but honestly, this was such an easy thing to do and then NOT worry about it after your 3rd baby is born. Especially when you are kind of on zombie mode for the first month.

• toilet paper
• wipes
• diapers
• laundry detergent 
• toothpaste
• non perishable food 

STOCK UP ON NEW THINGS FOR YOUR KIDS

Non-messy things that are easily done by themselves for those moments when you’ve had their shows on for way too long (guilty!) and you are ready for a guilt free break-

• crayons
• pencil crayons
• coloring books
• play-doh
• magic coloring books (ZERO mess)

TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF

Oh yeah, everyone says it, but holy shit!

 you gotta take this to heart!

Repeat after me:

I WILL TAKE TIME FOR MYSELF AND NOT FEEL GUILTY BECAUSE WHEN I COME BACK I WILL BE A HAPPIER AND BETTER VERSION OF MYSELF, SO HELP ME.

It took 3 babies to realize that the baby won’t die if you are gone for 30 minutes. Take the time and don’t apologize.

Instead of saying sorry, I needed that. 

Say thank you so much for stepping up for me, you rock!

IT’S OKAY TO STEP AWAY FROM THE BABY IF THEY’RE CRYING

This also took me 3 babies to learn.

It’s okay to step away and catch your breath.

Some days can be severely overwhelming, especially if it’s not just the baby crying. If you get lucky, your middle child will have some epic, throwing shit at the walls and trying to slap you tantrums.

Step away, regroup and tell yourself ‘this too shall pass.’

And it will.

The one you can thing absolutely count on is the time will flying by.

So slow down, don’t have any expectations of how things should or shouldn’t go.

Be kind to yourself and your children, it’s a wild time.

GET INSPIRED BY YOUR CHILDREN

Again, if you haven’t already! It’s easy to get caught up in how hectic your days are.

But

You are raising the next generation! 

What do you want your children to see? It’s important to find a balance of spending time with them but also showing them that they can do amazing things.

Every time I have a baby I get super motivated to do epic things! Like:

• Go vegan!
• Run a marathon!
• Start an online business!

Not that you have to do anything like that, but what do YOU want? For yourself and for your kids?

This is YOUR time, as well as theirs. It’s time to start knocking down societal expectations.

Open your mind to new ways of thinking and GET GOING. 

The only thing stopping you is…

YOU. 

If the thought of starting your own business hasn’t crossed your mind yet, let me plant a seed for you!

You are capable.

YES YOU!!

Start imagining being able to stay home with your kids if you don’t already, retiring your husband, taking that trip you’ve always wanted.

What’s stopping you?

Nobody has what you have to offer.

This book is completely free on Kindle and it will CHANGE YOUR LIFE!

BE OKAY IF YOU ARE NOT INSPIRED BY YOUR CHILDREN

There are going to be days where you are less than inspired.

That is 100% okay.

You need those days to appreciate the good ones.

Yesterday there wasn’t a second to collect my breath and by the time my husband got home I threw the kids at him and had a moment to myself. And I cried.

It happens to every parent at some point.

What matters is that you pick yourself up and move on.

BEING A MOM OF 3 IS A GIFT

It really, truly is.

It’s very easy to get wrapped up in your own shit and forget that some people struggle to even get pregnant, can’t get pregnant or have miscarriages.

If you are considering a 3rd baby (or second or fourth..) or are pregnant-

count your blessings.

Stop, take a breath, close your eyes

and just say thank you for blessing me with the chance to have another child.

You have absolutely got this ❤ Let me know in the comments how much you are killin’ it as a fierce mom of 3!

Being a mom is badass. You heard me. It really, truly is. Right from the moment of conception, throughout growing a freaking human being to meeting that wild, animalistic side of yourself in childbirth you never knew existed.

It’s badass.

And then we get to raise our kids which, at times, is scary as hell. And at others? BADASS, MOMMA. This post was written as mom encouragement, new mom encouragement, single mom encouragement- whatever kind of mom you are, this is for you:

This post contains affiliate links. Please see my disclosure at the bottom of the page.

You Give It Your All For A (kind of) Thankless Job

Seriously. You don’t have a boss looking over you, no one notices your accomplishments and sometimes that would be nice.

Imagine if you had someone to see how you handled this mornings melt down and they told you how much you rocked the shit out of that tantrum, you were patient AF.

But there is no there to see and sometimes it’s hard to remember that you frickin rock, mama!

You’re Raising The Next Generation

It’s up to us to navigate these crazy times, to show our kids how to be kind and courteous in a world that isn’t. It’s our job to ensure that they are loved enough that they will go out into the world and spread more love than hate.

That’s a pretty awesome job description. It’s also scary as hell. We got this!

You Stop Caring What People Think

I mean, kind of. It’s hard to seriously stop caring about what everyone thinks. When you have kids it all suddenly seems a lot less important because you have something WAY more important and valuable than Aunt Bonnie’s bullshit opinion on your parenting style- your children.

You Learn Valuable Life Lessons- FAST

Does anything teach you how to grow up and mature as fast as having children? They teach you about patience, humility, not always coming first, thinking about someone other than yourself. I honestly don’t know how long it would have taken me to learn these things if I hadn’t had children.

You Would Literally Die For Another Person

Now that- is badass. Had you ever considered that before? And it’s crazy because with your own kids, it’s such a nonchalant idea. It bubbles up in your head- If I could die to save my kids, I’d do it. 

And then you move on from that thought because you’re so dead serious, it doesn’t even warrant follow up thoughts. Amazing.

You Become Someone’s Hero (don’t fuck that up)

The day your baby is born, you become their world, their hero. It doesn’t matter if you think you’re overweight, swear too much, are covered in stretch marks or have a few sneaky chin hairs- YOU are their HERO. Embrace that!

You Learn That Others Can Come First (and you won’t die)

I think everyone needs to learn this lesson. When you’re parenting, instant gratification can still be found, but it’s harder than when you were living your childless days.

There is always someone to think of before yourself. And not that you can’t focus on you first sometimes, you should, but with kids it’s very difficult to do that.

But you learn something else.

Time, that sneaky bastard. Time has a way of speeding up exponentially when you have kids. So yes, it’s your kids first. But for how long? They grow so fast and become so independent. And by the time you can really put yourself first again, I’ll bet you’ll be wishing for those intense days with your young kids.

They grow up too fast.

***

I think we all ask the question ‘will I be a good mom?’ before we bring our first baby home from the hospital. You are exactly what your child needs, and your child is exactly what you need. You’re a fierce, badass mom. Embrace that shit!

Want more inspiring posts for moms?

• Millennial Momming- Are We Failing?
• Positive Parenting Solutions For Momma’s
• To The Mom Who Is Questioning Why She Had Kids
• Best Tips For Becoming A Calm Mom
• Ways To Beat Mom Burn Out

I know you aren’t questioning why you had kids every single day. It’s those rock bottom days where you are burnt out and just D.O.N.E.

This is encouragement for those mornings where you wake up and feel like a fire breathing dragon trying to stop your kids from killing each other before you’ve even had coffee.

Something that my husband and I have been realizing is that being a parent isn’t 90% amazing and 10% not. It’s more like 50/50.

Having 3 kids under 5 is challenging to say the least. But once you stop and accept that it’s not SUPPOSED to be this amazing highlight reel on a cute family drama, it makes it a lot easier to get through the day.

This is for you momma, the one who woke up and started questioning why you had kids at 6:00 am.

This post contains affiliate links. Please see my disclosure at the bottom of the page.

VISUALIZE

Close your eyes. Visualize your day how you want it to go. You see yourself reacting calmly and teaching your kids. You see them as they are- small children who need YOU to be there for them, teach them and fill them up with love- even when you feel like screaming.

I’m not saying this will completely work, but it does do something. It makes you stop and pause before you lose it because you’ve already seen yourself doing better.

This also works really well at night. Instead of guiltily replaying your day over and wincing at how awfully you reacted- change it. Imagine that you reacted just the way you wanted to.

Your day will be better the next day because of it.

KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS ISN’T FOREVER

Oh lord, I know how much easier this is said than done. When they’re screaming, slapping each other and fighting over every single toy they own.

One day, all too soon, they will be packing up their rooms and kissing you on the cheek as they say goodbye and move out of your house.

Of course, they’ll be back for dinners and holidays. But it will never be the same.

Your house will be silent and clean. There won’t be toys or craft supplies littering the floor. The cheerios will finally stay in the cupboard and the days of stepping on Lego will be over. They won’t reach for you knowing that a hug from mom will make it all better. They will be out there, making their own way and learning life’s hard lessons.

So I know it’s hard.

But cherish what you can and try to remember that it will be over too soon.

TRY TO REMEMBER THAT THEY AREN’T OUT TO PERSONALLY RUIN YOUR DAY

When I think about this, really think about it, I realize that the fights are all about them learning. The meltdowns are important for them to learn how to wade through intense emotions. The tantrum over not getting their favorite plate is actually just like you when you don’t get your favorite dish- you can just control your reaction and have learned to shrug things off.

That’s what they’re learning to do. And it’s important that we teach them how to do just that instead of reacting in that righteous anger (because what does that show them?)

I’m not not anywhere near perfect. I react in anger WAY too often. The important thing is that you are always striving to be better.

Some days it feels like 2 steps forward and 3 back. Other days you feel like friggin super mom because you handled everything with patience and a beautiful calm. Take it in stride and remember that not only are THEY learning, so are YOU.

You haven’t had practice at this mom thing. There’s always a new phase and some of your kids will be completely different than your first born. Cut yourself some slack ❤

ALWAYS TRY TO FIX THINGS

There have been days where I have fucked up so royally, it’s almost like my attitude is ‘well, it can’t get any worse so why bother trying?’

Try. TRY.

Your kids may remember you yelling, but if you own up to your shit, they sure as hell will remember that too. And what a good lesson to teach.

To come to them and say ‘I messed up. I’m so sorry.’

It’s something you’ll be able to expect of them when THEY mess up.

YOU WOULDN’T BE WHERE YOU ARE WITHOUT THEM

Children teach us so much. Sometimes, more than we’d like to know about ourselves.

They tend to show you a deep side, a side that perhaps never would have seen the light of day without them. Sometimes it’s scary to come face to face with the furious anger or extreme guilt we feel in regards to our children.

But on the other side, they show you the fiercest love and pride and joy you’ve ever felt in your life. I am so thankful for that.

So remember that they’ve taught you more about yourself than you ever would have known. They’ve taught you how to grow into the person you were meant to be.

YOU ARE GROWING AND LEARNING TOGETHER

This isn’t a race where you cross the finish line and someone hands you a juice and says ‘good job, you did it!‘

This is a journey that you are taking WITH your kids, and they with YOU. There will be highs and lows and so much learning, for all of you.

Know that your children will forgive you if you had a bad day, just like you need to forgive them.

You are your children’s guide into this crazy world and even though that can seem daunting, embrace it and realize you are raising some crazy awesome, kind and beautiful souls. 

Sending you so much love, especially if you are reading this on a particularly trying day. Leave a comment for other moms who are in the same boat. you are not alone on this journey through motherhood and parenting ❤

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Steps For Daily Positive Parenting